Quotes from a funny man

Fun Quotes from Terry Pratchett:

I have nothing to offer you except thanks, which of course are notorious for their evaporative tendencies.

She had never mastered the art of appologizing, but she apreciated it in other people.

You can work out how much energy a kangaroo uses when it makes a jump, count how many jumps it makes in a day, and deduce a lower limit on it's daily energy requirements.... Do the sums and you find that the kangaroos daily energy requirments is about ten times as big as anyhting it can get from it's food. Conclusion: Kangaroo's can't jump. Since they can't jump they can't find food, so they're all dead.
Strangely, Australia is positivly teeming with Kangaroos, who fortunatly can't do physics.

Myths, not least Jurassic Park itself, have suggested that dinosaurs are not 'really' extinct at all...Significantly no one has made a film about bringing back dodos, moas, pygmy elephants, or mosasaurs.... Only dinosaurs and Hitler are popular for the reawakening myth.
Both at the same time would be a good trick.

It means that either the universe is more full of wonder than we can hope to understand or, more probably, that scientist make things up as they go along.

Of course, it is very important to be sober when you take an exam. Many worthwhile career in the street-cleaning, fruit picking, and subway guitar playing industries have been founded on a lack of understanding this simple fact.